The best way to get out of being responsible for your own life?
Come up with an excuse.
And why not? If governments, corporations, organizations and iconic figures have taught us nothing in the past couple decades, it is that a good excuse will get you out of anything.
It is even better if you can invoke a law, rule or example to justify your excuse.
So, to help you avoid doing anything that is scary or might get people angry with you or is a puke-inducing leap into the unknown, I’ve compiled a list of some great excuses you can use:
- I’m worried I’ll fail
- I’m afraid I’ll succeed
- I’ll be out of town at my Nobel Prize acceptance party
- I’m afraid of snakes
- I’m afraid of unicorns
- I’m too vulnerable
- I come across strong
- I’m afraid of the unknown
- I’m afraid of what I know
- I’m afraid of carnies
- My parents made me this way
- I’ve never traveled before
- I’ve don’t need anyone
- I need to be with someone
- My boss wouldn’t like that
- I learned everything I know from the pack of howler monkeys that raised me
- I don’t know how
- I’m held back by the glass ceiling
- The dog ate it
- I don’t have a college degree
- My religion doesn’t allow that
- Someone with authority over me told me I had to
- I’m fighting the man
- I’m not a dirty dirty hippie
- I’ll do it tomorrow
- I’m not talented enough
- I’m too talented for that
- I had a bad experience once with Krazy Glue and feathers
- I don’t have a passport
- I only vote party lines
- No one understands me
- It’s not you, it’s me. And I don’t like you.
- I have an illness/injury
- I can’t leave my family
- I can’t live with my family anymore
- I can’t get a job
- I have to stay in this job
- I’m holding out for my acceptance into the astronaut program
- I can’t afford it
- I’m holding it for a friend
- I have a headache
- It’s too complicated
- It’s too simple
- My goldfish has depression and I have to feed him Zoloft at 3 PM
- I forgot
- No one will like me if I do it
- They will think I’m dumb
- It isn’t innovative enough
- That’s not part of my job
- I don’t have any time
- I’m too picky
- I’m too shy
- I have to re-lace my tennis shoes
- My husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend/cat said I couldn’t
- I’m unhappy with the way things as they are
- I’m happy with the way things as they are
- I can’t change
Or…if you want to write your own life story – if you want to accept responsibility for things – if you want to make an impact.
Then don’t fall back on these.
I’m not gonna lie to you. It might suck.
Sometimes you will be wrong. Sometimes you will colossally fail. Sometimes you will screw stuff up so bad that you stay awake until 4 AM for a week straight wondering how you let life get to this point and crying every 20 minutes or so because no one will ever love you for being who you really are.
But if you want to be able to wake up that next morning and, in those few fleeting moments of consciousness before you lull yourself into believing the excuses you feed yourself and the world, be truly deep down inside your soul happy with who you are and what you stand for…
THEN DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!
If that isn’t worth it to you, then save this page for a handy-dandy list of excuses to your hard drive.
It will come in very useful when you need to come up with a way to deny who you are and what you want to be in a pinch.
Photo Credit – Historically Hardcore Project
Note – Sometimes excuses end up being legitimate reasons. We all know which we are using when, if we are really honest with ourselves
Of your 57 excuses, I have used two of them on occasion/often. My excuses: I have to stay at this job; I can’t afford it.
Linda – Believe me, I’ve probably used at least 25 of them on one occasion or another. In fact, it was scary how quickly I was able to type the list!
YES! – and I have to say, I would also add Linda’s two to the list (not that I have used them or anything – ahem).
Haha, we all use excuses. Personally, I have used the howler monkey one numerous times in my life.
I do love me a good howler monkey reference! 😉
GREAT post! There are so many times in life where I catch myself making these excuses. I am really putting my all into being more proactive than reactive lately.
Shoot – thanks for commenting! I specifically bookmarked your latest post to linkback (added now after your comment jogged my mind!)
I agree very much. We can either react to what life doles out to us, or we can be proactive and create the life we want. Will there be obstacles and challenges and things that don’t end up the way we expected them to? Will it suck sometimes? Will we fail as often as we succeed?
Probably.
But at least we are doing it on our terms. For me, that is what helps to ease the mind at 2 AM. 🙂
Numbers one and two. They always, always, always hold me back. I’m terrified of failing and terrified of succeeding because sometimes, I don’t think I know how to do either. Hypothetically speaking. I’ve failed a lot and I’ve succeeded at a lot, but I tend to psyche myself out by saying this is the big stuff, that make it or break it stuff, the big time.
Maybe it’s about remembering what happened when you *didn’t* make an excuse and how you handled yourself that’s the key. When I did fail, I picked myself up again. When I did succeed, they were moments of pride. So why am I waiting in that in-between now?
Great list, great topic, Elisa.
I’m glad you got something from both those excuses. Well, not glad that you have to go through it, but that someone else was able to identify. I think often we paint excuses to be only negative. But it is just as easy to avoid something because we are warm and comfortable and complacent.
Or because we somehow deny ourselves those good things – as if good is never good enough or we don’t deserve it.
The concept of the in-between is intriguing. I feel like we have all been there regarding something in our lives. The thing is we can only last in limbo so long – then we have got to move forward or fall back.
Congrats on moving forward!!
Excellent list, people use excuses not only to hide from pushing themselves, but also to reinforce their own beliefs. Many say the time is bad to do something or blame the economy. Yes, the world won’t hand you a free ride, but there are plenty of opportunities for those willing to get up and go after them.
I think that any big risk (starting a company, going against the grain, falling in love) does not come at “the perfect” time. Because time isn’t fluid and will never stand still, the moment something is “perfect” it immediately changes.
You are right – there are no free rides (or if they are sold that way, you best read the fine print!) so if you are able to recognize opportunities and go after them, who knows what you might be able to do?!
(On another note – checked out your site, it looks new? Great concept, subscribed so I can keep up to date on upcoming stuff!)
Great post Elisa. If I named all the excuses I use (which you named half of them)the list will NEVER end. My main one is ” I’m scared”. Instead of making up excuses, I should do something about the situation. Thanks girl. I enjoy the list and the topic is great. 🙂
Cheila – As absolutely irritatingly FRUSTRATED as I am by the buzzword “Fear” in regards to holding people back, I do (sheepishly) concede that it is probably the emotion most associated with excuses.
I’d follow “scared” with laziness or motivation (my personal crosses to bear) 😉